Thot Topics

Livin' Covida Loca!

FEAR the Qdobavirus, it's comin' for that ass girl!!!
We shotgunned some iced coffee before recording so Creative Juices were leaking out of our fucking eyes and pitter-pattering all over the floor this week. It's the night of the VP debates, but we have far juicier fish to fry: we discuss Trump's 'Rona diagnosis (AND that sweet dumptruck ass), how Kamala can still win (this season of Drag Race), AND the gay guy selfie takeover of the Proud Boys hashtag (and every other hashtag in history)-- all before we catch Princess Nokia BLACK-HANDED and covered in yak's milk. Moooo!
Follow the girls on Twitter @VLRTUALBOY and @YOURE2BASIC, and the official Twitter @ThotTopicsPod. Pay our child support on Patreon. (We are the children.)

Be Besties!

Wow, now we REALLY aren't voting!
It's time for some more serious political newscasting. This week, we defend Playmate of the Union Melania Trump and her rights to the status of gay icon of American history despite the pathetic objections of the freaks over at "Queerty." Then, we tune in to the OTHER queer media--CNN-- and recap the events of the first presidential debate. Does Biden stand a chance? What would a Democratic victory actually change? Has anyone seen my dog!? But that's not all: we also talk about ugly people pretending to be mad about hot people having fun in Covid times, whether or not our voices are gay, seasonal anxiety, Nicki Minaj's new baby, our uhh "colorful" teenage Facebook pages, and more! Happy pay Kim Petras's rent month.
Follow the girls on Twitter @VLRTUALBOY and @YOURE2BASIC, and the official Twitter @ThotTopicsPod! Subscribe on Patreon to support the divas. 

Make America Fuck Me Again!

Content warning: g*nitals. OUR g*nitals.
 
Beloved himbos and hetards of the Thot Topics sisterhood, have we got an episode for you. For the first time in what seems like months there's actually some shit to talk about-- and we are in there like swimwear, babe. First, we discuss the voting hysteria and that ad that implores you to #GetYourBootyToThePoll. (We endorse these strippers!) Then, we unpack the pre-unpacked Lady Gaga video for her, uhh, "hit single" 911. LASTLY (as if that wasn't enough for you freaks), we get into the genitalia discourse: is it OK to have a genital preference? Pop the dick out of your mouth and you just might find out!
 
Follow the girls on Twitter @VLRTUALBOY and @YOURE2BASIC, and the podcast account @ThotTopicsPod! Make sure you subscribe to the Patreon to bring us that much closer to our dreams x.
 
In case you missed us, we're on the latest episode of Twink Revolution here. Catch us out of our habitat

Douched By Daylight!

Ooky spooky... 
Ladies, today, we come to you hoping that you can take us as we are: not as faggots, not as podcasters, but as... oh, god, this is so hard... g... g-gaymers!!! We recorded an episode with a close sister of the pod but we fucked up the audio so badly that we decided to workshop it a bit and give it to you in its best form. In the meantime, we offer you this: an EMERGENCY episode!
We used up all of the news of the week on the delayed episode, so today, pull up a vibrating gaming chair and get comfortable: it's gonna be a shockingly bumpy ride. Together, we play two extremely horrifying games: DEAD BY DAYLIGHT, and HELLO NEIGHBOR.
In yet another impressive feat of audio production from the Thot Topics team, we ask each other questions that probe deep into the psyche while our innocent Xbox avatars are routinely killed, splattered and screaming in the background while we talk about some girly stuff! You really get to know the divas on this one.
Follow the girls on Twitter @VLRTUALBOY and @YOURE2BASIC! And the official Twitter @ThotTopicsPod. Keep your eyes peeled this week for a special guest appearance from the girls on ANOTHER SHOW!!!

Ratpresentation AKA The 9/11 Special!

{Demi Lovato voice} Did you forget... 
Rest in peace to the chicks who were dying to be us on 9/11 (we were three and sooooo skinny)-- and to those new pledges from the Twink Revolution Extended Universe, uhm... we are simply cheesed to meet you...
It's just us girls again. Both of us didn't get jobs we were really excited about but we come to you, the listeners, with our hearts open and our panties dropped with the intent to exorcise those demons. We do a pretty good job by projecting our anger onto some tweets as well as the Motion Picture Academy, ultimately deciding whether it's okay for closeted people to make "queer" media, and whether or not the new Oscar rules are a Big Miss Steak.
In case any of you are feeling generous, we have a Patreon now where you can support this $14/month operation: patreon.com/thottopics.
Follow the girls on Twitter @VLRTUALBOY and @YOURE2BASIC, and the official Twitter @ThotTopicsPod. Mwah!
 

Thot Revolution! (feat. Twink Revolution)

Yeah, we're gay. Keep scrolling.
кто бы говорил! This week, we have Sam and Gian of Twink Revolution Podcast over for the sweatiest, bounciest slumber party/pillow fight of all time! Wait... omg, did we leave the door open? Ugh! Our eyes are up here, pervert!
This girls' night is strictly business, baby: we get to the bottom of the Twink Rev origin story, guide the twinks on a journey as they tap into their inner stan/misogynist, then dish on Lady Gaga's, uhh, "breathless" VMA performance. Plus: OnlyFans, queer theory syllabi, narcissism, Miley Cyrus's Anna Khachiyan haircut, Zoomcore, Grimes's pregnancy diet, going maskless as the new rawdogging, AUDIO FUCKING ISSUES, Frankie Grande's former throuple, mutual love and respect, God, sacrifice, deliverance, and podcasting.

You Don't Mess With the Lohan!

Gosh, is it bad to say that we had a Grand Old Time with the ladies of the RNC? Beats fuckin Billy Porter that's for sure, and this is definitely some of our best episode music of all time...
This week, we leave no stone unturned, no ass unwiped, no conversion therapy uncompleted, and no president unseated! Try to keep up, bitch.
We recap the RNC, ponder why jumping in a moving train doesn't send you flying to the back, discuss Lohanthony's dishonorable discharge from homosexuality, and ask some extremely pressing questions: Has "ironic" online homophobia among gay men gone too far? AND is Black Lives Matter protesting in white neighborhoods a total LARP?
Take a load off, you fucking freaks, cuz this is gonna be a wild ride!! Follow the girls on Twitter @VLRTUALBOY and @YOURE2BASIC.
For your reference and listening enjoyment: Zach Langley Chi Chi's IM SO POPULAR Episode 05: "Gay People and Personal Branding"

Pod de Replay!

We are fucking under attack!!! Download CUNT WARS.
Pretty slow news week, but we had a lot of fun doing the albums bracket a few weeks back, so we decide to loose our hottest takes about every pop girl (and man!) in the industry one by one in a race to the TOP! (Lol) All we DO this week is pit women against each other: Rihanna and Beyonce, Katy and Gaga, Demi and Selena, Bieber and Styles, and so many more. Plus, we choose a side in the great Billy Porter/Randy Rainbow divide, and celebrate the freedom of Lena Dunham from cultural indignity.
Follow the girls on Twitter @VLRTUALBOY and @YOURE2BASIC.
 

Cumala Harris in the Oral Office!

Loosen up, girlies-- cuz this episode? We lay it on THICK. This week, we're hot on the scene (we wore tennis skirts and noooo panties) of the "crime" involving Congressional hopeful Alex Morse, the mayor of Bumfuck, Massachusetts and his supposed flirtations with college students. But that's not all: we also unpack Kamala Harris's veep nomination and talk about suppressing the gay urge to support a woman with nice hair and legs in spite of her hobby of terrorizing communities. Of course, we also touch on some REAL news-- that being the release of Cardi B and Megan Thee Stallion's "WAP"-- and what it means for whores in this house, this country, and this world!
Follow the girls on Twitter @VLRTUALBOY and @YOURE2BASIC.
River Page - "The Woke Resurrection of a Gay Sex Panic" (Twink Revolution)

Blacking Out Is King!

Hey, do you like fitness? We'll then you're gonna LOVE fitness episode in those wet little ears of yours. This week (bitch you guessed it!) we review the new Beyonce "film" Black Is King-- plus, we reimagine what it could've looked like if she actually used good music (RELAX-- we mean her own).
Lucky for you we opt for only one racially charged conversation topic-- instead, we look inward at our experiences in P.E. class to answer to one of this week's hottest online takes: if gym class was less "toxically masculine," would there be less obesity? Only one way to find out, fatty. Strap on those thinking caps and hit the showers!
Follow the girls on Twitter @VLRTUALBOY and @YOURE2BASIC.