Thot Topics

The Israel Housewives Rejewnion! (Preview)

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Bitches must be Jewish cuz they pockets israelite... We must be thinking outside the bun because we're living HaMás!
We heard there's a situation in the middle east. Not to worry-- we're on our way. Period. We attempt to explain what's going on in Gaza to the breast of our abilities. Can't promise it'll be cogent whatsoever but we have a lot of dumb gay guys to address! 
Naturally, that's not all: we take to the Thot Topics Discord and answer some listener questions. Frank Biden's nudes! Troye Sivan in dragz! Halloween costumes! Chicago gay bars! Many truths are revealed...
Follow the girls on Twitter @VLRTUALBOY and @YOURE2BASIC, and the official pod Insta @th0tstarsxo. Stand UP for Thot Topics Rights on Patreon.  

Good Girls Go Chad!

"Sticks and stones may break my bones but chains and whips excite me." -Deuteronomy 23:1
 
We tried being good... but sometimes a girl needs to let her hair down and let LOOSE! As a cold lace front sets in on the beautiful city of Chicago, the girls settle in for a fireside chat of cosmic proportions, discussing everything from gym memberships to apartment hunting to the Roman Empire to fear to death to Rihanna! It's a big juicy one so get those teef ready!
 
We answer some leftover listener questions from our 100th episode extravaganza, but otherwise just kinda have a girly little chat. Catch you on the flipside! Na na na COME ON!
 
Follow the girls on Twitter @VLRTUALBOY and @YOURE2BASIC, and the official pod shitposting Instagram @th0tstarsxo. New merch is live in the store too! We're prepping some fun new experiments on the Patreon so get you a piece NOW!

All Scat and No Cattle! (Preview)

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This week, the girls have smeared coconut baby oil on their breasts to send a powerful message about consent. The message? It's simple: {motorboating noises}
We're back to discuss all the happenings of our precious young lives. From feeling immune to emotional music, to weight loss, to our inevitable 26th birthdays, we're feeling cuntemplative, heavy metal, and reflective. It's a soul-baring session for girls of all walks of life.
That's not all-- it's a big week for music and we talk about Doja's SCARLET, Slayyyter's STARFUCKER, and Kim's PROBLEMATIQUE. Plus, we talk about the guy covered in shit at Folsom. It's a roundup you WON'T want to miss!
Follow the girls on Twitter @VLRTUALBOY and @YOURE2BASIC, and the official pod Twitter @ThotTopicsPod. Fuck our mouth with an egg roll on Patreon. 
PLUS!! WE'RE BACK ON INSTAGRAM FINALLY: @th0tstarsxo 

Troy Savants (feat. Sydney) [UNLOCKED!]

Happy Birthday Sydney! We're unlocking her previously paywalled genius in honor of National Sydney Day and the new Troye Sivan single too... get into the festivities girl!
This is the hand that gives... and this is the hand that's taking it...
We're back and joined by the honorable Judge Sydney in the courtroom of the mind's eye, AKA the newly expanded Thot Topics Plus-Sized Creators Studio. There's MUCH to discuss and many beers to drink before we have to start our intermittent fast-- so let's get crackin'!
We talk about vaping, racist middle schoolers, Skai Jackson, Shane Dawson, Disney Channel Original Movies, and so much more. THEN, we launch into the main event: a discussion of Troye Sivan's single "RUSH" and the accompanying sexylicious gay guy music video. Does everyone have to be included in everything? What's the difference between being fat and being Fat™? Do artists owe you a spot in their world? LET'S CHAT!
Follow the girls on Twitter @VLRTUALBOY and @YOURE2BASIC, and the official pod Twitter @ThotTopicsPod. Our Insta might be gone forever we're still waiting lol. Step Up 2 The Streets on Patreon. 
Follow Sydney on Twitter @SYDNEYJ0HNS0N.  

Gyal vs. Wild AKA The Girls Go to Rainforest Cafe (Preview)

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WELCUM 2 THE JUNGLE BABY!
To celebrate our 150th freakin' episode, we do a little bit of GORILLA podcasting and bring our white asses to the TRUE Ape Escape: The Rainforest Cafe! Swaddled in the lush acoustics of the jaguars, toucans, chimps and elephants, we do what we do best and share our truest feelings over some questionable cuisine.
We involved our sisters in the celebration by soliciting topics and questions from listeners like YOU! We give advice to a new stepmom, "prove that we're gay," and discuss the ideal homosexual nuptials. Trust us when we say that you DON'T want to miss this! Grab a banana and let's monkey around sis!
Follow the girls on Twitter @VLRTUALBOY and @YOURE2BASIC, and the official pod Twitter @ThotTopicsPod. The law of the jungle compels you to Patreon. 

Insane Clown Pussy!

And the Nookie Tight Nookie Clean Award goes to...
 
We're back and wetter than ever! The girls convene at the top of the charts to take the cultural temperature through the top 15 of Billboard's new TikTok Top 50. We share our official stance on Christianity and make am embarrassing admission about Taylor Swift. SkeeYee!
 
Of course that's not all gworlfriend! We do a little chit-chattington about anti-semitic coworkers, Doja Cat and Nicki's VMA performance, and soooo much more. The give has been given!
 
Follow the girls on Twitter @VLRTUALBOY and @YOURE2BASIC, and the official pod Twitter @ThotTopicsPod. Paint the Coochie Pink on Patreon.

New Millennium Broadz! (feat. Alex Kazemi) [UNLOCKED]

In honor of our sister Alex Kazemi's pub week, we're unlocking our double-long extra thick and juicy interview for all our divas to enjoy <3 Get your copy of New Millennium Boyz, out tomorrow, Sept. 12 2023!
THANK U GOD 4 ALL THIS POD
We're joined in the atrium of the Thot Topics Literary Institute & Creative Learning Center by novelist and good-time gal ALEX KAZEMI, author of the forthcoming New Millennium Boyz! Lots of spoilers ahead so listen with caution (and with your tits out!) 
We talk about pop music's middle class, the dying art of celebrity, the R-word, weird ketchup, huffing household products, men only capable of being "gay" around women, straight guys' desire to get right up on the edge of doing gay stuff, NMB easter eggs, bloghouse, the evils of social media, and sooooo much more. The Thot Topics brain trust expands beyond our wildest dreams.
Follow the girls on Twitter @VLRTUALBOY and @YOURE2BASIC, and the official pod Twitter @ThotTopicsPod.  
Email Alex at fanmail@alexkazemi.com and pre-order New Millennium Boyz, out September 12 2023.

New Millennium Broadz! (feat. Alex Kazemi) [Preview]

**PATRONS ONLY** GET FULL ACCESS AT PATREON.COM/THOTTOPICS
THANK U GOD 4 ALL THIS POD
We're joined in the atrium of the Thot Topics Literary Institute & Creative Learning Center by novelist and good-time gal ALEX KAZEMI, author of the forthcoming New Millennium Boyz! Lots of spoilers ahead so listen with caution (and with your tits out!) 
We talk about pop music's middle class, the dying art of celebrity, the R-word, weird ketchup, huffing household products, men only capable of being "gay" around women, straight guys' desire to get right up on the edge of doing gay stuff, NMB easter eggs, bloghouse, the evils of social media, and sooooo much more. The Thot Topics brain trust expands beyond our wildest dreams.
Follow the girls on Twitter @VLRTUALBOY and @YOURE2BASIC, and the official pod Twitter @ThotTopicsPod.  
Email Alex at fanmail@alexkazemi.com and pre-order New Millennium Boyz, out September 12 2023.

Let’s Get Biblical!

It's time to crack open the oldest and boldest book in history. On the first day, God said "Let them give cunt!"
 
We are back to address the rumors, the drama and conflamma-- but that's not even the most important thing. We also play a few good old fashioned rounds of the Noah's Ark game, in which we decide who is allowed on the boat to God's New World, and who is most definitely not invited. Did it give Leviticus sweetie? We also present our bold new vision for public transportation across our great nation.
 
Join us or be washed from the Earth! American Pika gang GET UP!
 
Follow the girls on Twitter @VLRTUALBOY and @YOURE2BASIC, and throw us a freakin' life raft on Patreon.

Men in Blackface! (Preview)

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Trust us when we say this one's worth the four dollars... 
We're back with a newly expanded soundboard and a newly inflated fucking RACK and we're ready to take in the news. Owww! First, we ask the audience some pertinent questions about Steamworks and do a little bit of oversharing as a group. Then, we turn to former president Barack "Misdemeanor" Obama and analyze new findings regarding his potential faggotry. All signs point to YAAAAS!
Then, we talk about Billy Porter. So that's that. Then we discuss whether Pearl's controversial pic was blackface or not: is it blackface to imitate the people who sometimes get accused of doing blackface? Is blackface all in the lips? We inbreastigate.
Last but certainly not least, we discuss Rob Anderson's controversial Instagram stories on the hierarchy of good gay sex. {37 year old gay man voice} Do closeted guys REALLY do it better!?! 
Follow the girls on Twitter @VLRTUALBOY and @YOURE2BASIC, and drop us a dollar for our highly informative Billy Re-Porting on Patreon.